.

Two more finals and then I can erase this awful semester from my memory.

I pretty much didn't do well this semester, to say the least.

I let me emotions control me and take over my life, literally.

Thank goodness for another chance, because I am going to need it!

blahhhh

I think, at times, I am really good at hiding my true feelings.

And this, can be really awesome and really terrible all at the same time.

I have a hard time expressing how I really feel.

Even more so, I have a hard time accepting how I feel.

I like to hide my feelings because, to me, it is the easiest thing I can do.

I've been talking a lot about my past with my good friend Julie.

Not only have I learned a lot by talking to her but I've really been able to open up and bring deep rooted emotions to the surface.

I tend to look past the obvious and go with what I want, not what I need.

I'm learning there have been a lot of experiences in my life where I could have been a stronger person, but I surrendered, because putting up a fight is just too hard for me.

I all too often make excuses for other peoples actions and words. I take accountability for some things that really have nothing to do with me. I blame myself for things I can't control and apologize for things I should not.

I have been making so many excuses lately for what happened with Thomas.

I have taken the blame for everything. I continue to beat myself up over it.

I have stressed myself out to no end wondering what I did wrong.

And really, I have come to realize one thing, I did nothing wrong.

Sure, I may have made a few mistakes here and there.

But the bottom line is, I was me.

If he could not accept me for me, then that was his problem.

I apologized to keep the peace, and later took on the consequences for something that was not my fault.

In the end, I think I have come to realize that I deserve SO much more in somebody.

I should not settle for anything less than amazing.

No one should.

Someday,

I hope I can truly feel.

Because right now, the cover up is on.

Take off to something new

I am currently onboard flight 1246 from OAK to SLC.

I spent four short days back home.

It was great.

I got to clear my head, get refocused, and now am heading back to try and push through the last two weeks of school and finals.

There was something about this trip that I needed.

Maybe seeing my family helped me put things into perspective.

They always seem to know what to say to make everything feel ok.

Seeing my friends, too, helped a lot.

I'm really glad I was able to spend Thanksgiving with my family.

I think, in a sense, I've finally let go.

Something I thought was not possible a month ago.

But I'm ok.

I've been thinking...

When I started this blog it was titled "the start of something new" to record my new journey to Utah.

And though I blogged a bit about my adjustments to living on my own in an unfamiliar state, it really just served as an update to my life.

But truly, everyday is the start of something new.

This whole journey is new to me now, It is the start of something new and amazing.

This flight back home is the start of something new.

A new fresh start and I'm really looking forward to it.

Today, I am SO thankful for my amazing family that supports me unconditionally.

I am really lucky.

Turbulence just started.

Barf.

Things Change and People Change...but my life is still going on!

I can't even remember the last time I blogged, but I am sure it's been months.

A LOT has happened between now and then, and I may just not be ready to talk about it all.

Actually, I'll be blunt.

Thomas and I broke up.

It's been hard, it's been WAY hard actually.

After 11 months of spending each free moment with my best friend, it ended.

In a split second, it was done, forever.

I know that it happened for a reason.

For awhile, we were so right, IT was so right.

But now it's not, and I have to keep telling myself.

We helped each other get to where we our today in our lives, and now it's time we face what's ahead, solo.

There are no harsh feelings. I still deeply care about him, and I want him to be happy.

I won't lie, I had a lot of sleepless tearful nights.

I have never felt so empty, so lost, and confused.

All I wanted to do was go home. Back to what feels comfortable.

But time really does heal everything.

Life goes on.

I'm at peace with it.

In this chaos of things, I also was offered a new job as Westridge Academy.

It's a residential treatment center for troubled youth, and so far it's been an amazing experience!

I get to hang out with the girls, be a role model to them, listen and plan some really cool bonding activities for them.

I wasn't over being a CNA, I really liked my job. In fact it was really hard to leave SDCH.

I figured that since I wasn't studying Nursing (yet) that maybe I should work in my field of education. So working with troubled youth parallels my Human Development and Family Studies major pretty dang well.

It's a new beginning- when one was very much needed.

I've also been able to reconnect with old friends. Friends I probably should have been better at keeping in contact with. It's truly amazing all the people who have retouched my life within the last month and have helped to raise me up again. I am forever grateful for the friends I could call at 2am, who would listen to me cry, who watched me literally break down. I found out who my true friends were and gained some really amazing new ones.

I know that trials like these happen so that I can be reminded about how good I have it.

I am SO lucky to be surrounded by such caring, amazing, and selfless friends.

I am blessed.

In other non-related issues...

Utah is playing TCU on Saturday!!

YOU better watch the game.

It's going to be on ESPN!

I will be there- Look for me, I'll be in black ;)

It's the big black out game!!

You don't want to miss it!!

Oh and in OTHER news....

I am going home in 21 days for a beautiful Thanksgiving with my family.

It'll be amazing.

And what's even more special than that...

I get to go home for Christmas this year!

Miracles do happen.

Things work out the way they're supposed to, when they are meant to be.

Oh...and this semester is kind of shot through the roof.

Don't ask.

But I'll be amazed if I pass all my classes.

I'll leave it at that!

In Remembrance

I am currently playing "Mom" for Eliza and Lukas...and I'm loving it!

They are both curled up in their beds snoozing away, awaiting our afternoon outing at Kangaroo Zoo, per Eliza's request. They both slept soundly until 7:00am on the dot.

Love it.

I worked another 45 hour work week...wahoo overtime! Wahoo Holiday pay!

I don't have a "free" Day until...maybe October!?

Between today and the end of september I:

Have school twice a week

Work pretty much every day, except for the days I had to request off because....

my good friend Kellee is getting married and I'm in her wedding!

I am going to....DISNEYLAND and to see Mindy!!!

I haven't seen Thomas all week and it's been way crappy.

Between his servers going down and work and having to work almost 48 hours straight, our schedules have been opposite. He pretty much wakes up as I'm going into work..and by the time I'm off work I konk out just to get up and do it all over again.

Sometimes I really hate that he owns his own company...but I know he loves it so I do too!

It's starting to feel like Fall...argh.

Summer weather went away too soon!

Now when I walk out from work each night it's freezing!!

My mom even texted me "Haha it's warmer here than it is there!"

She wins.

Extreme dislike!!!

Today, I am feeling extremely proud to be an American.

For a number of various reasons.

9/11 will never be forgotten and will never become less important in our history.

It will forever be a black mark on the Calendar.

A day to remember, thank, and applaud everyone in our lives that has done something to better you.

I am so thankful for all my friends and family who have reminded me constantly that I have a lot to be thankful for and that I shouldn't take it for granted.

You all make me a better person.

And here's to my brother...who is dedicating his time and service to the Air Force on December 7th, 2010 for four years. What a stellar person to pack up, leave home, and start anew serving his country.

And to all the other service men and women...thank you!

God Bless the U S of A!

What are YOU thankful for?!

Same Ol' Same Ol'

I have no good stories to tell or anything exciting to report...as usual!

Summer flew by all too quickly.

I started School August 23rd and quit my part time job so that I could actually breathe.

I'm taking 14 units...

Photography

Methods Research

Human Development Theory

and

Family Economic Studies

After the first day of classes, I realized a lot of my classes require lots of reading and in-depth exploration of "why". I don't know "why" but maybe by December I should have a greater knowledge as to "why" everything is the way it is. Exciting.

On Mondays I am on stinkin' campus 8am-7:05pm.

Please remind me to never schedule classes that only meet once a week.

The Utes played an amazing game Thursday night that Thomas and I were able to attend...surprise surprise! It was a fantastic, over-time, crowd roaring game!

It brought back memories of my Dad taking us to all the Cal games back home- it is such a bummer to have to grow up and leave all the old traditions behind.

Thomas and I have MUSS (student section) tickets, that he will more likely get the chance to use more than I will. But at least we can say we went to one game together!

I didn't realize how into Football Thomas was until we got there!

I got an unexpected week off from work due to an injury.

I tore the tendons in my wrist and had to take a week off work...as well as wear a really hot brace. It was amazing all the extra time I had to do things with my life and see people I hadn't seen in awhile! I told Thomas I could get used to not working....he didn't agree.

I got my new IPhone! It's extremely fast!

Wahoo!

Happy first weekend of September!

Work Hard Play Less....

Or is it supposed to go Play Hard Work Less?!? Oh that would be the life!!

Since my last post....

I am a year older....good ol' exciting 21. Ok, not really. But I feel like it's a milestone to mention.

I went to Lake Powell over my Birthday weekend and had a blast! I'm so much more a water girl than a snow girl...please remind me why I moved away from the water and to the snow?!

I worked a whole 88 hours in one week. What was I thinking? Well the problem was I wasn't thinking...and I pulled a whole lot of nights of no sleep and long hours at work! It was brutal!

Thomas bought me an IPhone for my birthday...it arrives September 2nd!

I have had two whole days off of work since August 1st. On my days off I sleep, sleep, and occasionally open my eyes to get a few things done and errands ran. I don't recommend working a full time job and a part time job, especially if they are very physically draining jobs!

Thomas and I booked our tickets to fly home for Thanksgiving since this year I have to work on Christmas. Boo! But I am excited to spend at least one Holiday with my family

I also got my tuition bill...what a rude awakening. $9,000 for 13 units and $600 for all the books...crazy. I guess I'll really have to buckle down and focus on school starting August 23rd!

I am currently planning my friend Kellee's bridal shower...I should just open up a Bridal Shower business with the number of showers I've thrown lately!

Marc and Alyssa got married! I set Alyssa up with Marc, Thomas' good friend and also co-worker, and they got married! They're so cute together and their wedding was just perfect!

Thomas got a netflix account...I seem to be using it more than him...that's a new one.

And tomorrow begins another 7 days straight of work....with two days of double shifts....my next post may be my obituary...cause of death: over worked!

blabber blabber blabber...it's what I do best.

The month of July has flown by!

I got to work tonight and realized the July calendar had been taken down- they were already working on August's schedule...what!? Where did July go!

July has been crazy busy!

I always like to document milestones, but somehow I completely forgot to document the fact I've been living in Utah exactly a year!!!

As of July 11th I have been a Utah resident one year. Awesome! Thomas laughs at the fact I remember dates...it's a girl thing I tell him.

I rode in the back of a pick-up on city streets for the first time this past weekend. It was safe, legal, and a total blast.

Thomas took a group of us off-roading, which I am always so hesitant about in the beginning, to a spot that overlooks all of SLC. It's gorgeous. Now that the weather has warmed up it's an absolute perfect time to go. It was one of our first dates, so it's always nice to go back up to that spot!

Thomas and I went to the Rodeo last night. We agreed it wasn't the best rodeo we had been to, but it was still lots of fun! Bull Riding was our favorite event, but the bulls just weren't wild! They didn't put on a good show, maybe next time!

I have been busy juggling the demands of working two jobs. I don't think I'll be having two for much longer. Now that I have set hours and days at South Davis Community Hospital(40 hours a week), I don't have time to work at North Canyon. Bummer but that's life! Especially with school quickly approaching, I'll be needing to focus on school and one full time job to go along with it is enough.

I'm really tired of working every Sunday because that is usually the only day Thomas and I have the whole day to spend together. Working has cramped that style! Thomas brings me dinner most Sunday nights to my work make up for not being with him the rest of the day!

I turn the big ol' 21 on Sunday! Thomas and I are planning on spending Saturday up in Park City- it's so beautiful this time of year, I can't wait!

Now that I work 3-11pm I am a night owl and sleep in extremely late. Once I wake up it's time to get ready for work and do it all over again. I like this because A. I don't go out during the day and spend money I don't have...and B. because Thomas gets tons of work done without having me interrupt him. But...then I feel like I've slept my life away and there's not time to get things done! Oh the dilemma!

This time of year I'm especially homesick. I'm going to miss not celebrating my birthday with my family. I had a dream last night that Utah and Oakland were 10 minutes apart...wouldn't that just be ideal!

Happy almost August!

From Unemployed to Double Employment!

I have the two best Brothers in the world.

That's a fact.

I wish I had more time to update my blog and keep a better record of my life.

Such is life, spare time is precious and unheard of these days, but I like it.

A lot of changes have been happening in my life, which is to be expected I guess.

The thing I am most surprised of is how everything has fallen right into place how it's suppose too. I am not sure I can remember the last time I felt ok with not really having a plan and just seeing where the road takes me. I am always a planner, just ask Thomas, who sometimes gets annoyed that I can't just go with the flow. He's right, I have a hard time not knowing what comes next.

As my job with the Lovely Lockovitch Fam ended, I didn't know what was next. I had no job leads, nothing on the back burner, no real plan. This greatly scared me, but it also scared me that to some extent, I wasn't worried. I knew that it would work out the way it was meant to be.

I enjoyed some family time in Chicago and celebrated my brother's graduation from Northwestern University in the days following my last day with the Locko gang. It was nice to relax, explore a new town, and be with my family. I didn't have time to worry about what would happen when I got home, I just didn't think about it.

I ended up having two job interviews lined up when I returned and a few other job leads. I had nothing up this point, so anything was great! I ended up not having any "down" time. For being "unemployed" I stayed extremely busy from applications and interviews to random babysitting gigs here and there. I was shocked as to where my "time off" went.

I landed a job at North Canyon Care Center and started working two days within accepting the position. My path that I wasn't exactly sure where it was going, was finally going somewhere.

I have never felt so relieved to once again have a plan and to have found a job. However, I worried for awhile because I wasn't offered a full-time position, only part time.

Making ends meet was beginning to stress me out. Just when I was about to hit my panic button I got a call from South Davis Community Hospital. Again, I was offered a job and start July 13th!

This whole ordeal has been a huge learning process for me. It's allowed me to see that everything will work out when it's supposed to, that sometimes not having a plan is just as wonderful as having a plan. I know I am here today for a reason, that the new path I am about to embark on will be amazing with challenges that I don't doubt I can overcome.

I feel blessed to live such a wonderful life. I am blessed to have all that I have, especially my amazing support system who has cheered me on all the way.

In other random news, Thomas and I are heading to California in the morning. I am so excited to show him how 4th of July is done in Piedmont. It's one holiday I truly love, and I can't wait to share it!

I hope YOU have a wonderful, safe, and relaxing 4th of July!

Summer!

The warm Utah weather has finally arrived, a bit delayed!

I'm hoping it remains warm from here on out!

I am waiting to hear back from the State of Utah on when I can go take my certification tests.

In the mean time; I'm done with clinicals, CPR and First Aid certified, and am studying away for the exams!

I am hoping I can take the tests asap so that I can start the job hunting process!

In bitter-sweet news, I am enjoying my final days with the Lockovitch gang.

I am so happy I had the opportunity to watch Eliza and Lukas grow this past year.

They brought laughter into my life daily and have been so fun!

I am sure going to miss them, but I know it's time that I "get on with my life" and leave the "nanny business" behind. Nannying has been such a blessing in my life and has given me the support I've needed in my life. I've done and gone everywhere in my life because I've had such amazing opportunities to care for Children. I wouldn't be here in Utah if it weren't for Karin trusting me with her two beautiful Children, thank you Karin!

I'm going to miss you all!

In one short week I'll be flying off to Chicago. I'm so excited to be reunited with my Fam outside of California! I can't even remember the last time we were all on a vacation together.

Thomas is turning 23 Friday! Since he doesn't read this, and I doubt he knows I even blog...ok, well he makes fun of me for blogging...BUT we are going to Surprise him!

All his friends are meeting at Holy Smokes BBQ on Friday and I'll "work late" on Friday and so we'll go when everyone is there! I'm excited, he has no idea! He said he just wanted to go to dinner with me, well I'm boring, especially on a Friday night after working all week! So, I thought I would invite the whole gang and have a real party for him!!

23 Days to California...I can taste my Mom's cookin'!

Quick!

Just a REALLY quick update...

Thomas and I are going home for the 4th of July.

I couldn't spend a 4th away from home and all the fun traditions!!

I'm hoping my Dad's 1913 Cadillac will be up and running for the Parade this year!!

I'm still working on my CNA certification.

I have one more "clinical" day and CPR certification and then I can go take the State test.

I'm really enjoying it this far, although I must admit I'm looking forward to having my life back!

I haven't had time for anything else, I want to enjoy a little bit of Summer!!

My job is rapidly coming to an end.

I am sure going to miss seeing Eliza and Lukey everyday.

I got a new computer! I went for a MacBook Pro this time!

I'm lovin' it!

I am heading off to Chicago in two weeks to watch my Brother graduate from University of Northwestern. I am SO proud of him!!!

Thomas' birthday is just around the corner!

An apple pie is currently baking in the oven, it smells so yummy!

Life is good!

Passed

I did it!

I passed Math!

Hooray!!

And I ended up pulling an overall gpa of 3.18!

It's not a great gpa but it leaves tons of room for improvement!

At least I got the B average for insurance!

It'll save me tons of $!!!

It's OVER!

Summer is Officially here!!

Finals were exhausting, but alas they're over!

Being free has never felt so goood!

I start the CNA class in a week, I'm really excited about it.

I'll kiss my Summer nights goodbye for a few weeks as class is until 10pm.

Currently, I have a 4.0 but only because two of my classes haven't posted grades yet.

I'm sure that 4.0 will quickly drop.

I'll just take in the glory of it saying 4.0 as of now with the A that I earned in Art.

What a joke that class was.

The teacher was 75% of the time there.

We accomplished maybe 3 things out of the list of 15 we were supposed to.

My drawing only .5% improved, but any improvement is just great.

There were only two girls in the whole class.

80% of the class could not speak english, oh was that fun.

The teacher enjoyed my drawing ability, or lack-there-of.

But, it was probably the most fun and relaxing class I've had in a long time.

The math final was ridiculous. After studying hours and hours before the final, yes even at 5am the morning of, I felt like I still didn't grasp anything that was actually tested.

The test was written by the University Math Department, for every math 1050 student to take.

Well....maybe our teacher needs to have a chat with them because he didn't teach to the departments standards.

I don't want to know what I got at the final.

I'll now play the waiting game for grades to be posted...

dun...dun...dun....

Happy Friday!!!

One more to go!

I'm still alive...with one more final to go!!!

Summer, I need you NOW!

Quick weekend trip

One more week of school which includes two ridiculously hard finals.
Bring. It. On.

Thomas and I made an abrupt decision and ventured off to Moab Saturday night for literally less then 24 hours. We had a blast!
It was my first time to Moab and my first time Camping!
We slept in his jeep which was rather uncomfortable, but totally the "camping" experience
We hike to Delicate Arch which was so gorgeous!
We soaked up some sun.
Watched the car show.
We drove home.
Such a quick trip, but wort every second!

Now it's back to reality...two more finals to take and then it's Summer!
I can hardly wait!!!

quick update

I had three days off this week.

I didn't sleep in.

I shadowed my RN friend around the PICU for 12 hours (7pm-7am).

I went home and slept from 8:30am-1pm...It felt so good!

It was an incredible experience! I loved every minute of it...maybe I will pursue nursing! Who knows!

I also got my car fixed...no more cracked windshield and no more damaged mirror!

Now my car is not so ghetto anymore!

Fabulous!

That math test I complained about two posts back...I got a 64/70! Wahoo!

A lot better than a fat ZERO I would have gotten, had I given up!

If only I can Ace the Final...then I'll be in good shape!

Just a wish...that won't come true!

School ends in two weeks and I can hardly wait!

Only one more Art class...and it's only to hand in our portfolios...(which I totally need to work on this week!)

This is going to be fun!!

Hello Summertime!

In 14 days you'll be mine!!!

Summer is in the Air!

Life is good!

I completed the (below post) math test friday night at midnight.

What a relief it was to hand that sucker in.

I have three days off work next week.

I have two more weeks of School left, then a week of finals.

The Summer Sun is finally starting to shine down over Utah, about time!

I am starting my CNA course in exactly a month...I even bought scrubs today because I am that excited. (btw- scrubs are so dang comfy! I wish it was normal to wear them everyday!)

I am getting my car repaired next week...as in dropping a ton of $ on my poor damaged car....

I am shadowing my friend, Cecily who is an RN, in the PICU of Primary Children's Hospital on Monday. It should be a wonderful experience!

I am throwing two bridal showers, one tonight and one next saturday, party on!

Thomas has gotten off work this whole week before 11pm...it's been a real treat!

Thomas and I are going to indulge in Sushi tomorrow night. Yum!

I'm going to Chicago in exactly two months! It'll be the first family trip my family has been on in...I can't even remember the last trip we were all together! I am way exctied to see my brother graduate and explore Chicago!

My other brother, Andrew, just passed the ASVAB test for the Air Force and Chicago may be the last time I'll see him until after basic training! I am so proud of him for reaching his goals and fighting for his dream!

Lukas has had a major poopy bum all week.

It's been awful and yucky and miserable for him.

Poor kid. (not fun for the person changing the diapers either, let me tell ya!)

I got the dress for the wedding I'm going to be in!

It's cute, brown, and not too fancy so I can wear it elsewhere!

As much as I complained about having to take my drawing course, it's been a really fun and easy class. Sadly, I'm actually going to miss that class once it's over. I still can't draw, but I did learn a lot! The teacher even acknowledge the fun and joy I bring into the classroom...that's a first.

I hope YOU have a lovely weekend!

Enjoy the Spring weather!

Urgh.

I am SO ready for the semester to be over.

It seems that teachers enjoy throwing piles of work at you the last few weeks of class, to test your breaking point.

I think I've hit mine.

It appears (after I've completed the assignment) I took the wrong Math papers, that are due tomorrow at 8am...I had no clue I didn't have the correct papers until last night when discussing the problems with a classmate. Opps.

After getting the correct assignment e-mailed to me by the teacher today at 10am, I now have only tonight to do six hours of math, when I get off work,...on a Friday night.

To top the weekend off, I have math class tomorrow at 8am...I can think of much better ways I'd rather be spending my Saturday...like sleeping in!

Ontop of this mess, my week has been filled with changing poopy diapers, tons of Bio reading, Blizzards, no sleep, and a really exhausted-in-everyway state of mind.

I have 90 questions of Bio that need to get done this weekend too.

When will it end?!

I'm also busy planning two wedding showers.

Yes, TWO...I am crazy. It's a fact.

One is a food shower for my dear from Sara.

Basically instead of gifts, people are supposed to bring food that'll help feed the newly married poor college couple. The shower is next friday...any ideas on what fun games we can play!?

Also, my friend Codi is getting married in June and I'm throwing her a shower, (as one of her bridesmaids) on April 24th. Again, any fun ideas would be every so sweet!

If you didn't catch it, I'll be in Codi's wedding, exciting!

We're going dress shopping tomorrow afternoon...wahoo!

Thomas is off in Moab for the weekend.

Poor guy worked all week long, until the wee hours of the mornings almost every night.

He deserves this break, and he's doing one of his favorite things...getting his jeep dirty!

I sure do miss him!

I hope everyone has a relaxing and quiet weekend!

Enjoy the sunshine...it's finally here!!!

Our Trip Home!

Our trip home was AMAZING!!

The weather was absolutely perfect.

We even commented a few times on how HOT it was...hot for us is 65 degrees.

We arrived on Thursday afternoon and got lunch at Fentons.

If you are ever in the San Fran/Oakland Area, you MUST try Fentons Ice Cream.

It's delicious. Thomas and I shared a Banana Split and to our surprise we were able to eat every last bite. Yum.

We had dinner with my Parents Thursday night and just hung around.

We were both exhausted, him from the crazy amount of work he did before our trip and me from the normal craziness of my week. We felt like oldies going to bed at 10pm, but we desperately needed it.

Friday morning I had an appointment at 8am...which meant there was no sleeping in for me.

I sat there until 8:45 (the nurse came in and said my doctor was running late...uh ya, you think?!) that's 45 more minutes of sleep I could have had!!

I'm glad I was able to get that all out of the way and have my blood work done right there so that Thomas and I could go enjoy the afternoon!

We took BART to San Fran. Took the Cable Car down to Fisherman's Warf, walked around, explored, took one too many pictures, Spotted the "Bush Man" that entertained Thomas for over an hour, went for a walk along the Bay, and finally took the Cable Car back to downtown, or so we thought. Unfortunately, they weren't working the whole way so we got off in China Town and searched for things Thomas liked while he lived in Korea. We succeeded and found this yummy drink he really likes! It was weird but definitely good.

We also found the Fortune Cookie Factory!

We enjoyed my Mom's famous Corn Beef and Cabbage to end the perfect day!

Saturday we spent the day touring SF with my parents.

We walked along the Golden Gate Bridge (which I had never done)

drove down Lumbar Street, and took, yet again, one too many pictures!

I told Thomas that when we get old we'll have those pictures to remind us of our trip!

We spent the evening with my Aunt Kathy and Cousin Rachel and Rachel's adorable daughter, Natalie.

Sunday we had my Dad's famous Pancakes.

There's something about his touch that he adds to the batter to make them special.

I've tried to make them here in Utah, but I they just don't come out the way my Dad makes them.

We then took Bart back into the City to go see Beach Blanket Babylon, a must see if you're in SF!

It was hilarious, random, and fun!

We had one last meal at Home and packed our bags and called it a night.

Our flight left at 6:30am which meant we were up at 4am.

So much for sleeping in ;)

When we got on the airplane, we both fell fast asleep, even before it could take off and woke up just in time for landing.

It was a shame our trip ended so soon, we felt like we had just gotten there.

It was nonstop, action-packed fun.

I'm so glad my family was able to meet Thomas and visa-versa!

Thomas really enjoyed my parents, which meant a lot, since they mean a lot to me!

My Dad had Thomas doing odds and ends on his Computer all weekend, which they bonded over. It was fun to watch!

Now we are both in day three of reality.

Thomas has a deadline tomorrow so I haven't seen much of him since we got off the plane.

But that's ok, he took four whole days off of work, which was such a shocker!

I'm back in school and my usual work schedule.

Finals are quickly approaching which means I'm gearing up for some stressful times.

Those are always fun ;).

Soon enough it'll be summer and I'll be able to kick back for a few weeks and bask in the sun....wishful thinking!!!

Oh, by the way...I woke up to snow....while I worked it was snowing....while I was in class it was snowing...and as I'm typing this it's...SNOWING!!

It's Almost April! Where is the Sunshine!

I am half tempted to board a flight back to CA to get some Sun, as my Vitamin D levels are low, until Utah decides to break out the sunshine for good!!!

Completely Irrelevant Note....

I was pulling out of my garage this afternoon to head to school, when I looked to the side and realized my passenger side mirror was extremely close to the garage.

Well, I didn't think quickly enough and WHACK when the mirror into the side.

Yep, the glass shattered. But the actual frame of the mirror is perfectly fine, thank goodness. Not even a scratch. Just the class...perfectly crushed.

I couldn't help but feel sorry for myself as it happened, but as I drove down the street I laughed at myself. How stupid. How lame. What a mistake. Oh well!

Mirrors are replaceable, no need to get worked up over it.

But really, what a dork I am.

I called Thomas, after I stopped laughing at myself, and told him I had made a huge mistake and explain the situation to him. He laughed, and told me to take it into Honda to get it looked at.

Honda, happens to be on my way to school so I ran in, they said it'll just cost $30.15 to repair.

Awesome, a lot less costly than I thought it would be.

But still...that's 30 bucks I could put towards my car payments. Grrrr.

We live and learn!

First Motorcycle Ride EVER!!

Ooops...forgot this important detail....

I SWORE on my LIFE that I would NEVER ride a motorcycle EVER!

I think they're dangerous, a waste of life, and plain ol' stupid!!

Probably one of the only things I don't like about Thomas is that he has one...and loves to ride it.

After expressing my hatred of Motorcycles to my Mother the other night, she got me thinking.

"You won't know unless you try it" and of course "you only live once".

I was surprised to hear comments such as those coming from my Mother who, so I thought, was so against motorcycles.

Her final comment was "Just get on the freeway, it's always fun when you can go fast".

Shocked, I was a little delighted to have my Mother's stamp of approval of Thomas' motorcycle and her encouragement to try it...so I did.

It wasn't easy. I was so hesitant to get on the bike.

It was late at night and pretty dang cold, but I got on that bike and we took off.

Not many cars were out, so we went at our own speed which wasn't very fast, but I caught myself telling Thomas to slow down every ten seconds. I am sure I was annoying.

I hate to admit that riding on the back wasn't all that bad.

It wasn't scary.

I didn't die.

We were safe.

We wore helmets (ok, I did).

I might try it again...soon.

I think it would be a ton of fun to ride during the Summer night because it'll be sooo warm!!

I can't sleep because I have so much on my mind, so I thought I'd blog for the second time tonight.

This time last year I was struggling with life, no surprise there.

Wondering what the heck I was going to do with my life after DVC.

I was, also, in and out of doctor's offices wondering what the heck was wrong with me.

I was so sick of being sick.

I was so sick of feeling like I had no place in this world.

I so terribly needed a change.

And it all fell into place when it was supposed too.

I think far too often in my life I try to rush things.

I rushed my High School experience (thank goodness, no regret there).

I rushed living with my parents... (moved out when I was 17)

I rushed growing up.

I rushed being a normal teen without a job, without somewhere to be every morning.

I rushed my life for so long, but since I've moved I've slowed everything down and done everything not on my clock, but on Heavenly Father's clock.

I'm really trying to be a more patient person.

As I look back, I wanted so many other things in life early on, but they just didn't come.

I endured so much to get where I am today, but there was a reason for everything.

I really do need to remind myself, constantly, that things will happen when they're supposed to happen. Timing isn't always perfect, but it all happens for a reason.

I know I struggled the last few months in California for a reason.

I know I left California when I did because it was time.

It was time to move on to bigger and better things.

It was time to have a fresh start and focus on me.

It was time.

I need to remember that it's not my clock I need to be watching.

Everything comes together when it's supposed to, not when you want it to.

California Dreamin'...

....But not for long!
In just twelve short hours I'll be aboard a plane homeward bound.
I am so excited to be going home just to be going home.
I've been going home for funerals, for Holidays, Birthdays, etc...
But now, I'm going home to just have fun and relax!
I am so excited to show Thomas my Home.
Where I spent the first 19 years of my life becoming who I am today.
It's going to be a good weekend!

The Countdown

(I'm not adopted, promised!)

All I have to say is...

9 DAYS!!!

We are going home in Nine Days!!

I think I'm more excited than Thomas (it's a girl thing) but I just can't wait.

I can't wait for him to meet the people that are so important in my life from back Home.

Only

1 more Bio class

1 more Math class

1 more Art class

then it's Spring Break!!

I am going to spend my free evenings going to the gym.

Sleeping.

Studying.

and taking a Break.

And chillin' in California!

It'll be excellent!!

I wish I had more exciting news to report.

But I don't.

Work, School, Work...the usual.

Utah has been blessing me with some warm weather (in the 50s) this week.

My Sunroof has been open, the windows down, the heat off...it's been wonderful.

I can't wait for the summer warmth to hit.

Lukas has been really fussy lately.

It hasn't made for a happy Emily, or a happy Lukas.

He has a one-of-a-kind whine. A distinct whimper. An intense cry.

Oh it's brutal, oh so brutal.

I really hope he's just teething.

Thomas tagged along today (so nice to have "grown up" company) as we went to the Discovery Gateway Museum. Lukas put on a show for Thomas and finally Thomas understands kids are difficult, not always just so super cute. By the end of the two hours Thomas was with us, he was ready for a nap. Try ten hours!

I'm doing a lot better at saying no.

I think I have hit a selfish stage in my life.

I hate to admit it, I really do.
I feel like I am such a giving person and do so much for others and expect nothing in return.

But, for once I'm done focusing on others.

I'm focusing on myself and trying to balance my life without the fluster of other people's lives.

It's been really hard on me to become focused on myself because I care so deeply about each and every person in my life.

I hate to distance myself, but I just had to.

I was so overwhelmed and it just wasn't healthy.

I can say no.

and it's OK!

Tomorrow's Saint Patrick's Day and I wish I was at home to see the green theme I'm sure my Mom has going on.

From green foods to green toilet bowl water, it sure is fun!

I have yet to make it to the gym in the morning.

OK, so I'm NOT a morning person.

I can barely get out of bed for work let alone get out of bed an hour early for the gym!

But, I still go at night, I just think I'd have better days if I went early!

Urgh.

The struggle of my life right now is so dang hard.
I'm having an extremely hard time balancing my time.
Jetting off from one place to another is totally wearing me down.
I have got to find some down time, asap.
I have got to find some time to do what I want/need to do, asap.
I need to find time to explore, to grow and to live life, asap.

Summer...please hurry up.
I need you, now.

Good news:
Tomorrow is Friday.
I get to see lots of Thomas this weekend.
I get to take a nap after the gym Saturday.

Bad News:
I have 8am class Saturday.
I have to sing at Church.
Monday will be here too soon.
I have a ton of art work that I have got to buckle down and draw...ew.

Good news...

Good News Minute

The University of Utah accepted all my "allied" hours which can be applied toward my major...which means I am more than half way done with my major...which means I still have a ton of credits that are open to use for whatever I want!
(I must have 60 credits from the U, but by the time I'm done with my Major, I'll have 30 left to complete)
So...
Looks like I'll be having to double minor!
I'm thinking Criminology and Sociology.

*Allied hours are just basic general courses that go towards your major...which mine all seemed to do, thank goodness for my interest in physcology and sociology back in California, it really payed off!*

Random thoughts

Oh it was so warm and beautiful out today!

It felt as if I were home. In California. Where I so badly want to be right now.

Home.

I often refer to Utah as my home.

And, I guess it sort of is.

After a long day of work and school, I go home.

To eat, shower, and sleep.

But, this isn't the home I'm used to.

The last 20 years of my life are at Home.

In Piedmont, California.

A place I'll always call home.

A safe place that I can run to and hide.

Where all my lasting memories, precious and not so glamorous moments took place.

Home.

The place I find myself wanting to visit.

In 17 days I'll be home.

And it will be sweet.

On another note...

My stomach pain is back.

This time, almost unbearable.

All I could do today to get through the day was to sleep.

It was painful.

I'm looking forward to going to my doctor...at home.

Since, I have no one to call here in Utah when my body just doesn't feel right, I call home.

Where I confide in my Mom for her motherly words of wisdom.

It's peaceful.

It works.

Mothers really DO know everything.

On a side note, in May i'll be taking a CNA course.

This will be extremely different for me.

I've never done anything that doesn't involve kids.

But, I think it's time I broaden my horizon.

Try something new.

I'd love to work in a hospital, learn people's stories, and touch their lives.

Even if it's in the slightest way possible.

It can be done.

I know that not working with Karin and Alex anymore and seeing Lukas and Eliza daily will be so hard. But, I know that Lukas and Eliza will grow to be amazing children, they'll learn and grow so much while they're in preschool. I am so excited to see what little Miss Eliza becomes. I think she'll be a remarkable young girl. And Lukas, Oh boy, he's going to have the girls chasing him for miles. He's going to be on the run. He already is on the crawl, and boy does he move fast. I'm hoping I can still be a part of their lives, and watch them become even brighter children than they are now.

Life is full of changes...and I know it all happens for a reason.

Oh it's Friday!!!

BREAKING NEWS:

I've done it!

It's complete!

I've delcared my major...that I'm actually going to stick with this time...and I'm feeling oh so good about it!

DRUM ROLL......

Human Development and Family Studies

with a minor in....

Criminology

I'm pretty stinking excited about this.

I'll get to work with people and

change people's lives.

Oh, and It's FRIDAY...which means I have every reason to be oh so happy right now.

BUT...to top it off...Thomas registered us for the MUSS student section for the U home football games. This also means I can't take Saturday classes, which will make for an interesting dilemma as August approaches...tough decisions will have to be made, and we all know I suck at making those.

Happy Birthday to my Brother, Jamie!

I can't believe you're already 22!

Hope you're having a wonderful day!

The funk

The weekly funk, oh yes, I am in the weekly funk I seem to find myself in every Monday through Saturday. Why? Because I never stop and breathe. I never sleep. I never sit down and enjoy...sitting. I need to figure out how to balance working full time while going to school full time...because my school dedication is lacking in every area possible.

I also need to learn how to say no.

And learn how to do absolutely nothing on the weekends, except school work.

And learn how to make this funk mess less funky.

I need to declare a major by friday. Crap.

I kept getting all these e-mails that I simply ignored and deleted, until I went into my school acount and noticed an URGENT matter coming across the screen.

Why is EVERYTHING due this week- take home bio and math tests, Art work up the bazoo, and now I have to decide what I'm going to do with the rest of my life.

Spring Break.

Please.

22 days till Home.

To cheer me up, I think?, last night my mom sent me the Barney theme song...a little weird but it made me laugh while I was in the middle of working on the math test that took me 3 hours and it's still not completed.

My mom got an iphone...which is a huge suprise since she doesn't even know how to end a phone call using her last phone. I can tell she's really enjoying it by the mass amounts of texts she sends...pretty soon she'll be sending out more than I do. Oh what would we do without technology?

Where is my sleep!?!?

Lately I haven't been sleeping well.

That's an understatement...AT ALL.

I've been going to bed earlier than usual, waking up in the middle of the night, and can't get back to sleep.

It's awful. I'm more tired than ever. I sit and watch my clock until it rolls around to 6am and then I'm up for the day without a wink of sleep.

Even when I can sleep in till 7 or 8, I'm up at 5am.

I'm exhausted and I just want to sleep through the night.

On February...where have you gone?!

Don't get me wrong, I am extremely glad February is over, but it seemed to fly by.
I'm really glad it's March for many reasons.

* There's only three weeks left until Spring Break...which means I'll get a break from school AND work...what could be better.
** I'm another month closer to being done with this semester. Thank goodness.
*** Thomas and I have been dating four months tomorrow, exciting.
**** In 25 days I'll be headed to California, this time with Thomas.
***** Maybe this month Thomas won't have to work a lot *crosses fingers*, oh that would be so wonderful....speaking of working a ton, Thomas worked over 100 hours this week, not even going home to sleep for three days...I don't know how he does it. I get burnt out on working after 50 hours each week, but 100 hours, that's insane.

This week is going to be a killer.
Math Test.
Bio Test.
TONS of Art work due.
AND the BACHELOR FINALE!!!
Jake cannot pick Vienna, or I will loose hope in that show. Period.

I've been going to the gym a bunch. It's amazing! I'm loving every minute of it!
I don't enjoy being so sore, but that's a good thing, so I'll deal!


Sighhhhh


Here goes another Monday.
Have a wonderful week, everyone!!

Thank goodness it's Friday...(for Hannah)

My 7 Year old cousin e-mailed me this morning and informed me that I should "blog more!".

That's all she wrote.

So, this is for you Hannah!!!

What would you like to know?

In other news...I am SO thankful it's Friday. I'll be spending the night with my Theta girls who I haven't seen in forever and a half! I'm excited!

Then I'll hit the pillow and go to class first thing in the morning. Yuck.

I'm hoping to hit the gym tomorrow and maybe squeeze in a nap...I live for those.

Tomorrow night I get to spend it with Thomas...hurray!

I love the weekends!!

Have a safe and fun weekend, everyone!!!

xoxo

Something for me, for once.

I've been in a bad rut lately.
I feel like I go to work, go to school, come home and sleep and do it all over again in the morning.
Boring/hard/lame/frustrating/wheredidmylifego.

I do many things for lots of people throughout the week and I'm finding I rarely take a second to do something for myself.
So....
While I was sitting in my Bio class tonight thinking of all the better ways I could be spending my time....I didn't have any other better way. I feel like I have nothing going for myself but school and work....again, boring.

I had a thought, that I needed to put myself in a better mine-set about myself and my life, so I made a decision.

After I took my quiz, I grabbed my belongings, and jetted over to the Gold's Gym right by Campus. A really spur-of-the-moment decision. But, a good one.
Twenty minutes later I walked out with a membership in hand, having talked down the initiation fee to $1.00 (from $99.99) I thought this was a steal.
I went home, changed clothes, and went back to work out with my good friend Julie.

I think I'm going to like this.

And for once, I'm doing this for me.

And to set the record straight- so that you all can hold me to it, I said I'd work out at least 3x a week...given my crazy schedule, this should be a challenge in itself.

Gloomy Day

It's Raining. Not Snowing, Raining.

Weird.

I haven't really seen it rain this much since I lived in California.

I actually think I'd much rather have the snow...It's more beautiful to look out the window, instead of looking at dark clouds and wet roads...that's depressing.

I can't wait for it to be Spring- I'm sure it's really pretty here in Utah.

And then it’ll be summer...and there will be no more gloomy days like today, I hope.



Have I mentioned how much I'm not a fan of Valentine's Day?

If not...let me tell you.

I don't think there should be a day on the calendar dedicated to telling someone how much you love them, or letting someone know you care. I think that day should be any day, when someone feels the need to express their gratitude/love/whatever to another.

Thomas and I both agreed that we didn't need to go all out for Valentine's Day...and I'm glad.

I'm beginning to like, more and more, relaxing do-nothing weekends.

They're the best.

Friday night Thomas and I rented a movie with our good friends Kellee and Hank (whom soon should be engaged ;)). We ordered take-out Chinese food and became couch potatoes. It was perfect, just what the Doctor ordered, as my Mom would say.

Thankfully, I didn't have class Saturday morning so I was able to sleep in for the first time in, what has felt like, forever!

I spent the day running errands, being lazy, and procrastinating. My kind of day!



That night Thomas took me out to an extremely delicious restaurant that served Sea Food! I have yet to find a place worthy of going back for Sea Food, but this place was so good! I don’t know how they do it, because we sure don’t have fresh water anywhere near us! On our way home we randomly decided to hit up the Comedy Club we had our first date at. I am SO glad we did because it was probably the funniest one thus far! We were both passed out by midnight, we are getting so old!

On Sunday I spent the day with Thomas’ family. I love Sundays because that’s his family day, which I’ve become a part of! And, It’s guaranteed we’ll eat a home cooked meal, something I truly miss! We’ve also started a new tradition of playing Skipbo- a really fun card game! Last night the boys dominated, leaving Thomas’ Mom and I without a win, bummer! To top the awesome weekend off, Thomas and I bought our tickets to CALIFORNIA! We are SO excited to have the opportunity to go over Spring Break to get away for a few days! Thomas said “I’m going because I want to go with you and because I want your Mama’s cookin’”…oh he’s in for a treat!

I need to make sure I have more relaxing weekends like this last one. It left me not wanting to get out of bed Monday morning, urgh. I dread Mondays so much for a few reasons. My weeks are so busy with school and work, I have no time to get anything done. I don’t get nearly enough sleep as I need. Thomas works way too much during the week and we barely see each other. I don’t get a moment to breath.

Here, There, and Everywhere!

I feel like I've been floating around space with my feet planted absolutely all over the place!
The day after I got over the "24 hours of evilness", I flew to California for my Grandmother's funeral.
It was really nice to be at home, surrounded by family, celebrating the wonderful life of Nana.
I also got some time in with the best of friends, and headed back just in time for work Tuesday morning. What a whirlwind trip that was.

The day after I returned from California, Chelsea flew out from San Diego! It was absolutely wonderful having her here, and tons of fun! We even got in some night boardin' in! I survived, surprisingly, without any broken bones! Maybe I'll try snowboarding again, after all!!

Between my crazy work and school schedule, we didn't have all that much time to go off on adventures, but her company was so nice! I just feel like I haven't had a moment to stop and breath these past two weeks!

I'm completely exhausted and have to study for a HUGE Bio test that is tomorrow...
Life, it just never stops!

24 Hours of Evilness!!

I've decided I need to boost my immune system.
I got this awful bug, passed down my Thomas, last night that lasted a whole 24 hours.
Boy, was it a nightmare. It came on so quickly, and lingered around for too long!
I didn't sleep a wink. The bathroom floor was my best friend.


I've also come to the conclusion, due to last nights events, that I'd much rather have a cold than the stomach flu. Oh it was painful.

I checked my e-mail this afternoon and sitting in my inbox was this precious e-mail from my Art Professor:

Class has been canceled for tonight, 1/27

What a true blessing it was to read those words. Somebody loves me and is watching out for me because there is no way I could have made it to class tonight.

Poor Thomas is still sick...I'm praying he gets over it soon, I don't wish it upon anyone!

I hope you all are staying healthy! Beware of the evil stomach bug!

Living and Breathing School

Lately I feel like I've been living and breathing school.

I spent my Friday night rounding up Art supplies for my Art class with Thomas (what I fun date I am...)

I spent my Saturday morning sitting in a classroom watching the snow fall, dreaming of all the more productive ways I could spend my morning.

I spent Sunday night preparing for another busy week filled with work, school, and oh, more school.

And tonight I'll spend the night studying for Bio, drawing self-portraits (which will take me a long time since I can't figure out how to draw a nose...oh I have a lot to learn this semester).

My life consists of School and work...and a little bit of Thomas.

The good news is, I'm going home Friday morning for four days for my Grandmother's Funeral.

It'll be a whirlind trip, that will leave me wanting another vacation.

AND....the day after I get home, Chelsea will be here for a week! I'm pretty darn excited! I might even attempt to go snowboarding with her...oh what a sight that would be!

Happy Monday!

Summer? Now? PLEASE!

It's only day two of classes this semester, and I'm already looking forward to summer.
This cannot be good....

I will be running around like a chicken with it's head cut off this semester. I just know it.


On a Bitter-Sweeter note, I'm going home January 29th for a Memorial Service for my Nana! The closure will be nice, especially being around my whole family.
I need it.
I'm also excited to see my friends and get a taste of California!

I'm thankful for having the opportunity to receive an education. I shouldn't take it for granted.
I'm thankful for Karin for being so understanding with my crazy school schedule and my needy self. I feel like such an irresponsible person asking for more time off. But Life, it happens.
I'm thankful for my Mom who listens to my rants every night and offers the best advice she can.

Welcome Natalie Anne!

My new little Baby Cousin arrived a few days early!


My dear cousin Rachel delivered via emergency C-section
Natalie Anne Sowell
at 4:09 am!
weighing 7 lbs and 18in long!

And according to Rachel, "she's got lungs"!

Congratulation Rachel!
I can't wait to meet her



First Biology class tonight....oh this can't be good.

6 months...and counting!

It's Official!!!

I have been living in Utah six months TODAY!

I am amazed at how quickly the time has flown by!
I truly believe moving was the best decision I've made in a long time!

Some days I miss California more than others...but I think if I moved back, I'd miss Utah more than anything. It's crazy, but so true.

Let The Rollercoaster Begin...

My life is about to get a few more twists and turns.

Tomorrow, I'll start my first semester at the University of Utah.
Working close to fifty hours a week and
going to school 14 hours a week is going to be quite the juggle.

Finding time to fit other things in is going to be difficult.
I'll even be going to school Saturday mornings, so I might want to kiss my chances to sleep in goodbye.

Hello education...
goodbye my life!!!
I can now wear this sweatshirt officially...
I'm an official Ute.

Until We Meet Again, Nana

On January 6th my dear Grandmother passed away peacefully in her sleep.
After a short and ferocious battle with cancer, she took her last breath and left many great memories behind.

I'll remember all her hard work in the kitchen.
When we went to visit her when I was younger, Nana could always be found in the kitchen making various meals for numerous people. She was a fabulous cook and an even better baker.
Her Chocolate cake and cheesecake could be found on the counter, and was always consumed quickly thereafter.

Her laugh could make anyone smile. There was just something about it that I'll never forget, and I can't even explain her laugh. She often looked at me and told me how we look so much alike. Her red hair, long chin, small mouth, etc. I'm glad I have somebody's looks in the family, because I don't think I look like anyone in my family.

I'm glad she's not suffering anymore and I'm glad everyone was able to say goodbye.
We were able to prepare for her passing and I am so grateful for that.
I, too, am so happy to know that her journey is just beginning and that someday, we'll all be together again. This isn't goodbye, this is an I'll see you later...

RIP Nana

I am thankful I had twenty amazing years with her, longer than I had with my other Grandparent. I'm thankful she was able to be there for my High School graduation. I'm thankful I saw her before I moved to Utah and took pictures with her, pictures I'll have forever. I know she is, and would be, proud of me with whatever decision I make. She told me so.

2010 ramble #1

Happy New Year!!!

I feel like I am celebrating 2010 a date late..
It's now January 2nd at 4:30am and I can't sleep.
(*note to self: never have two Rock Stars at 12am*)

I've been thinking a lot about setting and sticking with new year's resolutions.
Those are so hard to come up with.
Commitments are so hard, either I'm letting myself or some one else down.
Hence, why setting resolutions are so difficult for me.

One thing I hope to accomplish this year is focusing on bettering myself and my future.
I need to find a balance in my life between school/work/fun time.
I need to take school seriously and focus on that over anything else.
I've never really put the time or effort into school like I should have.
But I think, for once, I'm ready to.

I've realized that by this time next year I will have gone through two semesters at The University of Utah.
I'll be 21.
I'll have been living in Utah 18 months.
I'll probably have lost touch with friends and connected with new friends.
My Brother will have graduated from Northwestern University.
I'll have survived one long and cold Utah Winter.
I'll have change, a lot, but that's to be expected.

I'm excited for what this year will bring.
I know that whatever is sent my way, that I'll have the strength to overcome it.
It will only make me stronger.
I know I'll have obstacles that will challenge me to greater abilities, and for once, I'm excited to hurdle over them.

As I look back at 2009, the change in who I was as of January 1st, 2009 to who I am today, January 2nd, 2010 is unbelievable.
I'm so much more confident in my abilities.
My drive to do better increases daily.
I feel that 2009 was my journey to get back on life's path; as I definitely decided to try the road less traveled, that ended in many dead ends.
I'm happier; I can't even describe why or how. But I am, and I love it.
I feel that I'm going somewhere. I'm finally on my own and learning so much about myself.
I'm grateful for the trials 2009 held for me. I know that without them, I would not be who I am today.

In exactly 11 days I will start my first Semester at The U, and another whole chapter of life will be opened up to me, literally.
I'm excited, I really am.

This post is a bunch of ramble, but that's what two rock starts will do to you.

I'm going to write something I'm grateful for everyday and today it only seems fitting that I mention my family.

As the Holidays came and went, I noticed the absence of my family in my life more.
Don't get me wrong, they're in my life, but being so many miles away from home (and especially during the Holidays) made me appreciate them all the more. I know families are forever, and what a blessing to know, but being away from them is so tough sometimes.
I am grateful they are only a phone call away. I am so thankful the love and support they have given me each and every day. I know that we may not always see eye to eye, but I still love them. I definitely miss them a lot and can't wait to spend time with them, whenever that may be.

Enough of my ramble.
I need sleep.